It's been a long time...

It's been such a long time since I logged into this place.
Partly coz I have nothing to update...
And then I was lazy to update...

But the main reason is I'm bz with GACKT (stuff) hahaha...
My G collection has increased yet again and I need to get another new cupboard...
Time to go IKEA again~~ maybe this week end, since somebody rejected my offer (my body, AHAHAHAHA)

Talking about that, when is the last time I had sex??? Hmmm...
It's more then 3 years ago...
This is scary!

O_O!

I need it badly!!!!!!
But I didn't want to just do it with anybody...

Sigh...

Recently, while chatting with a friend, we talked about G and my fantasies.
And I asked him,"Can you accept that u will never be the most important, most love person in ur gf's heart? U can only be 2nd the most."
He say he's cool about it...

O_O!

And I asked, "So, if I am ur gf and I tell u that I am going to sleep with G. Will u accept it?"
He said "Can."

O_O!! スゲ!!

And I asked "What if I got pregnant with G's baby, can u still accept it?"
He said "Y not? And I will love him as my own child."

OMG!!! This is the kind of man that I can be with!
But it's too bad it's so not gonna happen between us. No way...

 絶対無理です！
全然だめです！！
うわ。。。怖いです！！！

私はGにエッチ物事したい~~

孫燕姿《當冬夜漸暖》MV 完整版

很多事情 不是谁说了就算
即使伤心 结果还是自己担
多少次失望表示着多少次期盼
事实证明 幸福很难

...我们之间 不是谁说了就算
拉扯的爱 徒增结局的难堪
一百次相爱只要有一次的绚烂
下一次 会更勇敢

当冬夜渐暖 当大海也不再那么蓝
当月色的纯白变得阴暗
那只是代表快乐不再那么简单
当冬夜渐暖当夏夜的树上不再有蝉
当回忆老去的痕迹斑斑
那只是因为悲伤从来都不会有答案

我们之间 不是谁说了就算
拉扯的爱 徒增结局的难堪
一百次相爱只要有一次的绚烂
下一次 会更勇敢

当冬夜渐暖 当大海也不再那么蓝
当月色的纯白变得阴暗
那只是代表快乐不再那么简单
当冬夜渐暖当夏夜的树上不再有蝉
当回忆老去的痕迹斑斑
那只是因为悲伤从来都不会有答案

当冬夜渐暖 当青春也都烟消云散
当美丽的故事都有遗憾
那只是习惯把爱当作喜欢

重要的是 我们如何爱过那一段

2011, March 11

on tis day, things had happened...

first, its was my birthday...i spent it in the hospital...becoz...

secondly, my mum was hving a heart operation...thr's fluid surrounding her heart and it made her heart difficult to pump and thus made her hving difficulty in breathing. luckily the ops went thru successfully, and

lastly, Japan had the worst earthquake in their history...thousands were made homeless, lots of death, electricity were cut off, huge tsunami damaged the lands, houses, cars, airport forced to close down and more...a factory doing chemicals exploded, their Gov had to evacuate the ppl around tat area...

in Tokyo, ppl had to walk 4 hours to rch hme...the streets were crowded with human traffic...buses took 1hr to travel 3 bus stops...all transportation were stopped, trains and planes...n he, in his purple Lamborghini, were stuck in it too...and with a sadden heart, wrote his blog...before rching hme 4hrs later...

its a sad day...

luckily, my frens (and their families)in Japan r all OK.

most importantly, the man i love is alive. i wouldnt noe wat to do if anything happens to him...

GACKT　さん、 気をつけてね！

LUNA SEA - I for You 【LIVE・高画質】

ねぇ、本当は誰も
ねぇ、愛せないと言われて
恐がりの君と出会い
やっとその意味に気づいた。

傷つく為今二人出会ったなら悲しい過ぎるよ。

心から君に伝えたい
きっとただ本当の君の姿を求めて

まだ不器用に笑うね
まだ悲しみが似合うから

君と出会う為だけにそう
生まれたなら変えられるかな

心から君に伝えたい
傷つき過ぎたけどまだ間に合う
心から君を愛してる
君に降る痛みを脱ぐってあげたい全て
I For You

心から君に伝えたい
君の笑顔いつも見つめられたら

心から君を愛してる
君に降る光を集めてあげたい全て
I For You

nee hontou wa dare mo nee ai senai to iwarete
kowagari no kimi to de ai yatto sono imi ni kizuita

kizutsuku tame ima futari deatta nara kanashi sugiru yo

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai...
kitto tada hontou no kimi no sugata wo motomete

mada bukiyou ni warau ne mada kanashimi ga ni au kara

kimi to de au tame dake ni sou umareta nara kaerareru ka na...

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai
kizutsuki sugita kedo mada ma ni au yo
kokoro kara kimi wo ai shiteru
kimi ni furu itami wo nugutte agetai subete I for you

kokoro kara kimi ni tsutaetai
kimi no egao itsu mo mitsumeraretara

kokoro kara kimi wo ai shiteru
kimi ni furu hikari wo atsumete agetai subete I for you


Hey, the truth is that someone said, hey, that I can't love anyone
I finally realized the significance of meeting you, who is so nervous

If we met one another in order to get hurt, then this is just too sad

I want to tell you something from my heart...
I'm just looking for your true form

You still smile awkwardly, sadness still suits you

If I was born in order to meet you, then I wonder if I can change?...

I want to tell you something from my heart
I'm hurt a little bit too much, but I'll still be on time
I love you from my heart
I want to wipe all of the pain away that falls on you, I for you

I want to tell you something from my heart
If only I can always look upon your smile

I love you from my heart
I want to gather up all of the light that falls on you, I for you

五月天 突然好想你 MV

最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚
绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息

想念如果会有声音
不愿那是悲伤的哭泣
事到如今
终於让自已属於我自已
只剩眼泪还骗不过自己

突然好想你
你会在哪里
过的快乐或委屈
突然好想你
突然锋利的回忆
突然模糊的眼睛

我们像一首最美丽的歌曲
变成两部悲伤的电影
为什麽你
带我走过最难忘的旅行
然後留下最痛的纪念品

我们那麽甜 那麽美
那麽相信
那麽疯 那麽热烈的曾经
为何我们
还是要奔向各自的幸福
和遗憾中老去

突然好想你
你会在哪里
过的快乐或委屈
突然好想你
突然锋利的回忆
突然模糊的眼睛

最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚
绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息
最怕此生已经决定自己过
没有你却又突然
听到你的消息

First Love - Utada Hikaru

さいごの きすは たばこのflavor が した
にがくて せつない かおり

あしたの いまごろ にわ
あなたは どこに いるんだろう
だれを おもってるんだろう
* You will always gonna be my love
いつか だれかと またこいに おちても
I'll remember to love you taught me how
いまは まだかなしいlove song
あたらし うたうたえる まで
たちとまる じかん が うごきだす としてる
わすれたくない こと バカリ

あしたの いまごろに わ
わたしは きっと ないてる
あなたを おもってるんだろう

Saigo no kisu wa tabako no flavor ga shita
Nigakute setsunai kaori

Ashita no imagoro ni wa
Anata wa doko ni irundarou
Dare wo omotterundarou

You were always gonna be my love
Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember soo long you taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Ima wa mada kanashii lovu songu
Atarashi uta utaeru made

Tachidomaru jikan ga
Ugoki dasouto shiteru
Wasureta kunai kotobakari

Ashita no imagoro niwa
Watashi wa kitto naiteru
Anatawo omotterundarou

You will always be inside my heart
Itsumo anata dake no basho ga aru kara
I hope that I have a place in your heart too
Now and forever you are still the one
Ima wa mada kanashii lovu songu
Atarashii uta utaeru made

You were always gonna be my love
Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to long you taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Mada kanashii lovu songu
Now and forever

Once in a while
You are in my mind
I think about the days that we had
And i dream that these would all come back to me
If only you knew every moment in time
Nothing goes on in my heart
Just like your memories
How I want here to be with you
Once more

You will always gonna be the one
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Oh, don't say no
You will always gonna be the one in my life
So true, I believe i can never find
Somebody like you
my first love

Once in awhile
Your are in my dreams
I can feel the warmth of your embrace
And I pray that it will all come back to me
If only you knew every moment in time
Nothing goes on in my heart
Just like your memories
And how I want here to be with you
Once more
yah yah yah

You will always be inside my heart
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Please don't say no
Now and forever you are still the one
In my heart
So true, I believe I could never find
Somebody like you
My first love
oh oh

You will always gonna be the one
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Oh, don't say no
You will always gonna be the one
So true, I believe I could never find
Now and forever

张惠妹 如果你也听说KTV

突然发现站了好久 不知道要往哪走
还不想回家的我 再多人陪只会更寂寞

许多话题关于我 就连我也有听过
我的快乐要被认可 委屈却没有人诉说

夜把心洋葱般剥落
拿掉防卫剩下什么
为什么脆弱时候 想你更多

如果你也听说 有没有想过我
想普通交朋友 还是你依然会心疼我

好多好多的话想对你说 悬着一颗心没着落
要怎么附和 舍不得又无可奈何

如果你也听说 会不会相信我
对流言会附和 还是你知道我还是我

跌跌撞撞才明白了许多
懂我的人就你一个
想到你想起我 胸口依然温柔

如果你想起我
你会想到什么

蔡健雅 - 無底洞MV

有时寂寞太沉重
身边彷佛只是观众
你的感受没有人懂
难得谁自告奋勇
体贴让人格外感动
爱上他前后用不到一分钟

嘿～回想恋情的内容
有谁想过有始有终
不过是一时脆弱让人放纵
嘿～
穿梭一段又另一段感情中
爱为何总填不满又掏不空
很快就风起云涌
人类的心是个无底洞
尝试亲吻尝试拥抱或沟通
没有好感再尝试也没有用
大多数人都相同
喜欢的只是爱情的脸孔

没有谁背后怂恿
不该爱又爱的冲动
是你害怕孤单而拼命补充

很快就风起云涌
人类的心是个无底洞
尝试亲吻尝试拥抱或沟通
没有好感再尝试也没有用
大多数人都相同
喜欢的只是爱情的脸孔

說好的幸福呢

你的会话凌乱着
在这个时刻
我想起喷泉旁的白鸽
甜蜜散落了

情绪莫名的拉之
我还爱你呢
而你断断续续场着歌
假装没事了

时间过了 走了
爱情面离选择
你冷了 卷了 我哭了
一开始都不快乐
你用卡片手写着
有些爱只给到这
真的痛了

怎么了 你累了
说好的 幸福呢
我懂了 不说了
爱淡了 梦远了
开心兴不开心一一细收着 你再不拾
那些爱过的感觉都太深刻
我都还记得

你不等了 说好的幸福呢
我错了 泪干了
放手了 后悔了
只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着
要怎么停呢

怎么了 你累了
说好的幸福呢
我懂了不说了
爱淡了 梦远了
我都还记得
你不等了 说好的幸福呢
我错了 泪干了
放手了 后悔了
只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着
要怎么停呢

Few hours before flying off...

really wish i dun hv to come bac after i leave here...not tat i dun love my family...i love them, but...

i feel tat i dun hv a life here. it doesnt mean i will hv 1 if i leave here but staying here really feels shitty...haiz...conclusion is i dunno wat i wan in life...

there r times i really feel tat dying now will settle everything (not now thou...i m flying off soon lol)

*day dreaming again* ~~~ will i see u?

じゃ、またね！
(ja, mata ne!)